Welcome Day One!
This is the simplest title I can give this post.
I’m going to say today was my Q & A day. First off, I really really had a hard time looking past what I was eating instead of focusing on praying and reading.
As an added note, I will be referencing my prior posts because they are all linked moving forward.
With that being said, yes I had a tremendously hard time looking past food. Why? Well, because I have wired my brain to think I can do all things perfectly if I put my mind to it. I didn’t want to miss a beat and I wanted to assure myself that everything I consumed was passable for the fast. WRONG WRONG WRONG! You see, my screws didn’t line up with the right tool.
This thought process of mine went into hyperdrive and fried my brain with my understanding of this fast. See, I had so many technicalities about what I should and shouldn’t do I missed the whole point of it. Check out my order of events today.
- Wake up
- Get dressed
- Brush my teeth
- Make my bed
- Go downstairs
- Grab my notebook and bible
- Search for scriptures to read
- Found scriptures
- Write them down
- Read them
- Close my book and bible
- Leave to go grocery shopping
THAT’S WHERE IT ALL BEGAN.
Whoo, welcome day one. Hear me good when I say this. I messed up. What does that mean? It means this fast didn’t go perfectly on the first day. Shocker right? Yea I surprised myself too.
See I was aiming for the bullseye without thinking of the practice it takes to land it.
As I walked down the aisle with my aunt Janet my eyes began to soar. My feet were walking in directions I didn’t need to go and my hands were grabbing things that weren’t necessary. Originally, my intentions were to snag a few more items just to get me through.
Wrong again. Throughout being in the supermarket, I commenced with my Q & A segment. First, it began with “Why can’t you eat this if it is labeled vegan? This should be ok for the fast.” Next, I wondered why so many ingredients were on “organic” foods that I couldn’t pronounce. Then, I started thinking, is there anything permissible to eat?! After reading everything I REALLY became puzzled as to “what am I going to eat?!”
My aunt Janet had me ask myself a few obvious questions. One of those questions were “why are you so worried about the food?”
That’s when everything started to become clear to me. Why was I focused on what I was eating? I definitely made the process much harder than what it could have been.
Most noteworthy, for you all to NOT follow my steps…I didn’t get my full prayer time in because I was focusing on the food! It is no understatement when I say it is hard releasing control over everything I am accustomed to. All the time I could have had to pray and read was spent on how much food I had to last me for the 21 days. Y’all, I got to do better. It was embarrassing for a second but I was learning.
I understand that you can only go one way when you are trying to reach a certain point in life.
What sense does it make to have the process go easy without some type of challenge? What purpose does it serve if you feel comfortable with the fast? I mean, how can you truly learn? People never really learn a lesson until the ugly part of life hits them. That’s when everyone’s knees fall to the ground asking for this blessing and that blessing. BUT, if you really think on it…would you have learned anything, let alone prayed to God had that ugly moment in life not happen to you? I doubt it. You aren’t the only one I’m guilty as charged.
In a layman term, get over yourself. Stop allowing what is not important to crowd your mind. We as humans become susceptible to our weaknesses because of the CONTROL we have over them. Why do you think its so easy to keep doing what you know is wrong? Whatever your weakness is, it will continue to be just that until you release the control you have over it. Once you change your mindset, and focus on the bigger picture, then will you begin to see the transition. Maybe even a little glimpse of heaven 😍